By Scott Shaw
As a martial arts author, I have written so much about defending yourself against the hidden assailant and/or what to do when you are unexpectedly attacked. It seems that in the physical realms of reality it is much more easily discussed what to do, when. When it comes to the other levels of life, when you are attacked, from an unexpected opponent, defense seems oftentimes more complicated. Why? Because like all unseen attacks, the coward is attacking you from a position of surprise where defense is never easy.
Think about a time when your life was shaken by someone coming at you and attacking from some unseen location. Maybe this was in some form of an insult, a lie, a harsh criticism, a false discourse, cheating, breaking your heart, you name it—the list of this style of attack is sadly very long. Why did they do it? In most cases, it was because they wanted to hurt you. In other cases, it is not so devious, it is simply because they did not really care about your feelings. They put their own feelings over yours and, thus, though the hurt they unleash may not be as calculated as someone who is intentionally attempting to damage you or your life, what they did painfully hurt, nonetheless.
Take a moment and isolate one of those attacks that came at you out of nowhere. How did it feel? Undoubtedly it damaged you.
There are some people, in fact many, who unleash this style of attack; who will claim that you deserved it. You had it coming. They do not like you or what you do or what you say so they attack from some hidden position. But, does their not liking you or being mad at you, (or whatever), give them the right to hurt you from afar? Of course, when you are on the receiving end, you will say, “No.” But, turn this around for a moment, what about when you did something like that to someone else? What was your motivation? Of course, you felt the same set of emotions of wanting to unleash hurt to that person. But, did you ever question the truth of your why?
Most people who behave in this manner easily find a justification for doing what they do, in the capacity of clandestine hurt. But, as in the case with all justification, the unleashing of hurt is only a very self-centered ideology, based upon a specific set of beliefs harbored and emulated from a single individual. Yes, what they do may spread to the minds of others, but does that make it true or right? Or, is it simply a selfish manifestations, instigated by someone who cannot see beyond their malignant self-doubt and/or self-hatred.
Hurt, especially the cowardly act of hurting from afar, is always unleash by someone who does not possess a sense of universal awareness. They do not hold empathy. Because, if they did, they would not stoop to the level of this style of attack. Think about that statement…
In life, there are really two levels of mindfulness: there is the selfish and the Self-Based, from which hurt and hatred is unleashed, then, there is that of caring. Here, empathy is born. This is where helping, not hurting emulates from. This is the home of the God-Mind. Where do you dwell?
You know, some people hurt, and they want to attach their name to that hurt. They want to get credit, fame, money, ego-stroking, or whatever else from unleashing the pain. Many/most do it from some hidden realm, however, where they can hurt but no retribution will find them. Those are the true cowards.
This being said, an attack, no matter from where it is launched, is still an attack. What do attacks lead to? We all know the answer to that: hurt, pain, counterstrikes, and war.
There’s this great line delivered by Mickey Rourke to William Hurt in the movie, Body Heat, “Hey now, I want to ask you something. Are you listening to me, asshole? Because, I like you. I got a serious question for you: What the fuck are you doing? This is not shit for you to be messin’ with. Are you ready to hear something? I want you to see if this sounds familiar: any time you try a decent crime, you got fifty ways you’re gonna fuck up. If you think of twenty-five of them, then you’re a genius - and you ain’t no genius. You remember who told me that?”
Many attackers, especially those who attack from afar, believe they can get away with it. They do it because they believe they can get aways with it. They do it just because they can get it done and hid their face and their name in the process. But, even on realms like the internet, finding out who did what, if you have the skillset, is pretty easy. Then what?
Now, I can say, attacking anyone, for some self-motivate reason, is wrong. We all know that. We all know that especially when we are on the receiving end. Then it’s all, “Boo Hoo. Why me?” But, what about when you’re doing it? Who are you thinking of? Who are you caring about? Who are you feeling for?
I can talk about deflection. I can speak about the proper techniques for the counterattack, as I have done in so many articles on the martial art. But, what life ultimately comes down to is you being the better person. You being the one who does no unleashing of pain. Can you be that person? Can you be that strong? Can you be the beacon of light in the sea of darkness? Or, can you only be the person who allows their Lower Mind to control them?
We all know what hurt feels like. But remember, the hurtful are always the ones who are ultimately looked down upon, no matter how much they hide their unleashing of their attack. The helpful are always the ones who become universally loved. Who do you want to be? The person who hurts or the person who helps?
Hurt never equals help. Remember that.
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